Note for the trainer: However assertive the words may be, help participants experience physically that the message loses its power when body language is passive or aggressive.
Method: Physical activity. Ask participants to enact how to approach children with a “firm but caring” stance.
Materials: A sufficiently large activity area.
Physical adjustment exercise: The trainer asks participants to stand and form pairs in the room. The trainer writes the following fixed assertive statement on the board: “I am busy at the moment; I will come back in ten minutes.” The trainer gives instructions in turn, and partners face one another and say the same sentence in each of the following three modes:
Passive posture: Shoulders lowered, head down, no eye contact, voice at a whisper.
Aggressive posture: Chest excessively pushed forward, finger pointing, hard eye contact, loud and threatening voice.
Assertive posture (“Stand Tall, Speak Firmly”): Feet balanced on the floor, shoulders upright, direct but calm eye contact, and a clear, firm tone of voice.
“As you have seen, the words we used were exactly the same in all three rounds. In the first round our boundary was not taken seriously because we appeared like a Turtle; in the second round, even though we used a polite sentence, we attacked the other person because we appeared like a Shark.
When we speak, children observe not only our words but also the energy conveyed by our body. Assertiveness begins in the body. By bringing the rule ‘Stand Tall, Speak Firmly’ into daily life, we show children that it is possible to protect boundaries without raising one’s voice.”