Note to the trainer: Do not dictate the rules; enable participants to create them. People take far greater ownership of rules they have established themselves. Emphasise the rule of confidentiality in particular, because personal experiences will be shared in later sessions.
Method: Creating a group agreement.
Materials: Large sheet of paper or board and coloured pens.
Opening: The trainer begins as follows:
“This group will grow together over the coming weeks. At times you will share very personal experiences - difficult moments, mistakes and emotional vulnerabilities. For this room to be genuinely safe, we need to establish some rules together. Tell me: what would need to be present in the room for you to feel comfortable in this type of training?”
Developing the rules: The trainer writes participants' suggestions on the board. Rules that have not yet been mentioned are introduced gently by asking: ‘What do you think about confidentiality? Should something personal that someone shares leave this room?’ The following rules are usually established:
Confidentiality - ‘What is shared here stays here.’
Active listening - Do not interrupt before the person speaking has finished.
Non-judgement - No feeling or experience is belittled.
Freedom to participate - If a question makes someone feel obliged to answer, they may say ‘Pass’.
Mobile phones on silent - Throughout the meeting unless there is an emergency.
Approval of the agreement: When the rules have been completed, the trainer says:
“We all promise to follow these rules. Please raise your hand if you make that commitment.” (A brief silence and applause.) “Excellent. This is now our Group Agreement. It will remain displayed on the board.”